Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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