I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
