Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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