got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
My breasts were aching with rage.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
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