my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
