Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
