you win again, gameday.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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