My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize
