After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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