69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
