For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
