actually, I'm a sock model
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
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