You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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