so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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