Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I have so many feelings about this burrito
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
