I think my vagina is haunted
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
