shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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