He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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