Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
They have beer where we have blood.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize