i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Do vagina's smell?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
