found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
