It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
