Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
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