not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
i would one night stand the shit outta him
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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