Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
operation harelip BJ is a go
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
