So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
