Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
