Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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