already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
