it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I still have a little drunk in my system
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
