I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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