those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
