Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
youre lurking in front of me
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i think i have two assholes
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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