well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
pray to the hookup gods
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
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