you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
