apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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