I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
