Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
