In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
