Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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