We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
