so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
