I can tuck mytits in my pants
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
