if you like me you must not know who I am
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
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