i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
