i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
