Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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