We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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