i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
