sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
