No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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