At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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