I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
This house was built for laser tag.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
It's never too late to be topless.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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